Worthiness & Purpose Pursuit

After writing about LOML, I feel kind of melancholy realizing I’m capable of the love I was given by him in my own way, but unable to express it to the one person most deserving of receiving that from me. I know now that my expectations of this person being “the one” create the feeling of loss I’d spent so much time lingering in. The lesson really was to learn my own capacity to love and the need to accept in equal measure what I know I am able to give. I’m more than thankful to his influence because I … Continue reading Worthiness & Purpose Pursuit

03.24.2017

I really enjoy observing and hearing from this man. That’s a problem. Red flags are flapping and flying in abundance, but there’s also much that has what seems like gravitational pull upon me. I hear the call of his shortcomings as much as his attributes and must consistently remind self to disregard expectations and attachments in order to fully experience the reality of each moment without superimposing my emotional baggage onto any situation. Slowly, I want to back off sexually because I know acquiescing (as much my desire as his) affected the direction of the relationship and the likelihood we … Continue reading 03.24.2017